Played golf today for the first time since our company last held its annual golf day. The hot sun beat down hard on my neck and I had difficulty handling the sheer hotness of it all. I didn’t kick any ass, I just got really thirsty.
I drank a red and orange Gatorade (preferring the orange I think it has a more natural flavour), two bottles of water, one that I brought myself but it got so hot in my bag I could hardy drink it, others were generously supplied by friendly chap in a cart he also gave me a Schweppes and had to duck when I whacked a shot off the 14th straight into his cart accidentally and I only went to the bathroom once in the course of five hours of action because I was so dehydrated.
Squirming on the grass at the final hole, my vertebrae miraculously snapped back into place. Back at the clubhouse, in the cotton blend company of khaki, I tried to join in conversations about retirement villages and Chinese developers with expensive watches, but my input was pretty minimal I drank an entire jug of beer by myself. The highlight was standing in the sprinkler, which made my clothes smell like barnyard animal.